On turning 32 in India…

I had the fortune of celebrating yet one more year of breathing this past September 10th. My initial plans were to find out how they celebrate birthdays in India and really do it up right. Come to find out, it’s just like the states. Kids get all the fun while adults get a few congratulations and a couple of jokes about growing old.

One of my favorite songwriters, David Wilcox, has a song called “Down Inside Yourself” about a middle-aged man in the middle of his mid-life crisis that seeks out an Eastern guru in India for direction and answers to his life. When the wise man is consulted, he simply gives this timeless advice, “Get some sleep, eat some broccoli, run a mile, take a shower.”

So to avoid any old-age moss growing on me, I actually found myself performing a slightly altered version of this wisdom on my birthday.

Sleep? Got it.
Broccoli? Ate a cucumber instead.
Run a mile? Pushups, pull-ups and a walk to the market.
Take a shower? Had to.

Now the funny thing is that I had borrowed the Physical Education book from Rakesh, the PE teacher at Jen’s school, to study up on the rules of Cricket and happened to see a section on Yoga stretches. Being an adventurous and fairly flexible sort of chap, I thought I’d give them a go. I made the mistake of trying to start with PADMASANA, the lotus pose. After nearly dislocating my ankle, I moved onto the other ones. I managed to successfully complete 8 1/2 out of 12 yoga stretches.

The position of which I can only claim half complete is the gravity-defying MAYURASANA pose. The following are the books pictures and my intructions.

Step 1 - Begin kneeling and place hands on ground.


Step 2 - Lean over and begin placing body weight on elbows resting on chest. Experience partial enlightenment (notice light.)


Step 3 - Balance the body in the horizontal position with the arms resting on the ground. Ram elbows into chest cavity, bruise ribs and make a mockering of gravity. Experience complete elightenment and squeal in pain.


To be fair, I did feel much more relaxed after stretching. It turned out to be a great birthday as I was able to talk to family and friends on the phone for the first time and enjoyed many birthday e-mails. Our neighbors also took us to a local craft fair, onto dinner and even bought me a frozen dessert - with which I was very tempted to ice one of my newly bruised ribs. And in case you were wondering, I personally don't recommend trying the MAYURASANA unless you're either underwater or at least under 30.

Jimmy